Wednesday, March 28, 2012

doubting: an update.

I am not a science person. I am a math person. I like figuring things out. I like not having to memorize much, just some formulas here and there. I can handle that. My brain likes numbers. So when I walk into biology class at the good ol' GTCC, I don't start jumping for joy. The entire row is usually empty except for me and one guy. I don't have a clue of his name and he's never spoken a word to me in his life. It's not the most exciting hour of my day. There's one girl in my class who usually asks a lot of questions, changes seats three times before making up her mind, and leaves class and comes back in at least seven times. So that's interesting. Other than that, it's just me and my notebook, and the occasional text message. I copy what's on the screen, try to focus on what the teacher is telling us, and retain a little knowledge in order to make an A on the tests.

The class isn't horrible. We talked about genes for a while...which was cool. DNA is interesting stuff. But now we're on to evolution and boy is it boring. Seeing that I'm not a science person, I don't know a whole lot about it and I can in no way prove scientifically that the earth was in fact created by God and that evolution is ridiculous. So as I sit in class, sometimes I try to decide what makes sense, what part I should believe, and what part I should just try to remember so I can make a good grade and then forget it. I've realized that it's just easier to memorize it all, take the test, and forget it, rather than trying to decide what is true or not.

Now on to the the real topic. The above paragraphs were the preface to the following paragraphs. If you remember, while in China I blogged about my doubting problem. I was very encouraged and realized that I was in no way alone and so many other people had the same issues. (Thank you for your feedback, by the way.) So I have come to give you an update. I'm doing much better. When I doubt, I push the thought out and focus on what I know to be true.

I have come to the realization that trying to convince myself that there's enough fossil evidence and that they've found this artifact and that scroll and blah blah blah, it's easier to think about what I know and what I can experience. When they talk about all the scientific stuff, it doesn't help my doubting issues because I don't understand how it either proves or disproves creation/evolution since, like I said, I'm just not a science person.

When I was at the Rise-Up conference last December, Scott Degroff mentioned something in one of his seminars about how when he and his wife talk to their kids they don't just use all the science stuff to answer their "how do we know the Bible is true and creation happened and everyone else is wrong" questions. They show them how God has provided for them and shown Himself to be real.

And I tell you what. It works. These days when I start doubting, I think back to all those times when this person's life was spared, and that guy's prayer was answered immediately. In the same seminar Mr. Degroff talked about a time when their children needed new shoes. They sat down together and prayed that the Lord would provide a way for them to get shoes. The same day someone showed up saying that they wanted to take the kids shopping so that they could buy them some shoes. They didn't just send some money or say they just wanted to take them shopping for whatever they needed. They specifically said shoes.

Um, this sort of thing doesn't just happen. It was a clear answer to prayer. I hear people talk about this all the time. They prayed for something and almost immediately the prayer was answered and God provided.

I have this skirt. It's not special for any reason, but I used to wear it all the time. I wore it to church like crazy. And then I lost it. I wasn't happy about this since I wore it very often and after I had looked everywhere I was just frustrated that I couldn't find it. One random day, a long time after I had lost it, I prayed that I'd be able to find it, not because it was a big deal, just because I liked the skirt. Lo and behold, either that day or the next (my memory fails me...not surprising) I found the skirt.

I mean seriously. It was a skirt. God answered my prayer about a skirt. How cool is that?

Just the other day I was thinking about how I hadn't been able to give a homeless packet to someone in a while, which I love doing. So, you guessed it, I was driving down the road and I asked the Lord for an opportunity to give one to someone. The same day, I was driving again and, yep, I passed a homeless guy and gave him a homeless packet.

When I doubt, this is what I think about. And it gets me every time. This stuff doesn't just happen. You think there's no God? All of these things can't be a coincidence. You believe in God but think He isn't personal? Well, He obviously has been hearing our prayers and answering them.

So next time Satan puts a doubting thought into your mind, think on how God has provided for you and how you can see how faithful He has been.

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